career

Theft of Spirit- An Under-Considered Symptom of Burnout

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It’s one of those “if you see it, it’s already really bad” things. “You see one cockroach or rat in plain view in your kitchen, you’ve already got an infestation.” That fact that you can see the problem means that it’s a big problem.

In this case, however, it’s more about what you can’t see– or not as clearly, not anymore. To quote Pastor Rob Bell, “Despair is the belief that tomorrow will be just like today.” You can’t see a better tomorrow. You can’t see a brighter future. You can’t even imagine it without a painful focus on the worst-case scenario and feeling exhausted from work not yet conceived.

Burnout includes a “theft of spirit,” and you forget how to dream.

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Life After The Line Part II- A Different Position

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When I’m not exhausted beyond reason, furious at pompous bureaucracy and the odious input of “higher ups” that outsource their problem-solving to ChatGPT, I do still in fact love to bake.

I truly do still love making things for people. I love giving my work to others, watching them eat it, knowing their day got better for a moment because of my work, and maybe even teaching others how to do that magic for themselves.

As much as previous cafe jobs put me through, it was always the environment and the management, never the work. Even when I was dragging my ass out of the French bakery at 10am after starting at 2, hoping to find a place that wouldn’t question giving me a post-shift beer over brunch, I loved looking in the display case as I left. I saw everything I’d made that morning, people and kids pressing their noses against the glass at crusty kouign-aman and caneles, and think to myself “I helped make their day start better. It was all worth it.”

It took and takes a LOT for me to lose sight of that fact. Fine dining has always been a pleasure of mine and that kind of work- being a pastry chef- is the best way to gain access to good ingredients, new technology, and have excuses to experiment. Your local bakery cafe doesn’t mess around with agar agar (unless they are vegan.) They don’t need a PacoJet, and getting obscure or rare materials is not always a priority- or even in the budget. They’re making delicious breakfast pastries, cookies, and pies- not plated desserts for $15 a hit.

When you set off on a culinary career, it’s good to know what you love about it and find the path that support it. It’s never too late to learn more about yourself and change.

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How To Live Forever

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If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing.’

– Ben Franklin

You don’t get to decide whether or not you are a mentor. Your apprentices decide that when they determine whether or not they can learn from you- and the absolute greatest feeling on Earth is when your apprentices succeed.

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Moving Right Along- Quitting, Sunk-Cost Fallacy, and Learning to Let Go

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Learning to let go is one of those skills that no really thinks of “mastering” until it occurs to them that they need to.

Depending on the circumstances, people can let go of things very easily. When whatever we are dwelling on feels inconsequential or already impermanent, we probably don’t care that much when we lose it or let it slip.

Other stuff, though- the important stuff, the intangible things- can keep us hung up for years as we learn that they were just as impermanent as everything else. Maybe we know that “this too shall pass,” but were hoping to get lucky in a macabre way- thinking we’d never get to see their end and thus it can feel eternal.

All things end, though. It’s the price we pay for getting to experience them at all, and it gives them their worth and rarity. Learning to let go with compassion and grace is vital to emotional wellbeing– and that can include letting go of goals and dreams as well. Giving up on an old dream can set you free to find a new one.

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This Is Your Story

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Want to really piss off a millennial? Ask them “What did you think your adult life would be like growing up?”
Want to have a full-on existential crisis? Truly and sincerely listen to the answers– and wonder if you haven’t forgotten being that pissed off once too.

Sorry about that. Let me make it up to you by sharing a comforting truth- success is relative, and how it looks is up to you.

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